I keep waking up from this dream, something no one else has ever seen. I often wonder if this is a repeated memory or if it’s something that happened to me from something other than the things that I have experienced together with another?
3:15 am the clock had struck at the exact moment I woke up, staring into the dark void that is for certain my ceiling and dusty fan. Looking at it yesterday when it was light Jessica told me that it looked as if it had never been cleaned. But why am I thinking about this at 3:15 am and why is it everyday that I have this memory?
These were the simple questions, the ones that I asked myself daily as I lay here at 3:30 am now after staring at the blank dark ceiling. The room was almost pitch black minus the little bit of light that snuck in from the street lamp outside and I often wondered if that was my imagination. Thought is endless in my mind, I think of a thousand different things all at once, it is impossible to explain.
I woke up, but something is different this time things didn’t really make sense and it was like I was struggling to figure it out. Getting out of bed seemed harder than usual, everything looked the same but I knew it wasn’t. I thought I had been here before, it was something sudden this time.
Everything was like I had remembered it, but something was different. People call this deja vu, like I have lived this moment before. That is when I realized it worked, I had been trying to go back and change it for years. But I was back where I started this time. Maybe I could do it differently, from what seemed like a distant dream.